Con Artist - Part II

So, I'm going to my very first Comic Con. Ever. I'm terrified. Part of me is afraid that I'm not geeky enough to hang. The other part of me is scared that I will find myself in throes of trekgasm, and totally spazz out.

One of the reasons I decided to finally go this year, is the 25th anniversary of Star Trek: The Next Generation. I always said I would only go to a con if I could achieve my perfect Trek-fecta, which would be Patrick Stewart, Wil Wheaton, and choose one: Marina Sirtis, Jonathan Frakes, or Brent Spiner. (listed in order of preference) Bonus points for Whoopi Goldberg, Micheal Dorn, Gates McFadden, or John de Lancie. When the line up for this Comic Con was first announced, it was pretty close to the 'fecta, and I decided it was time to gather my nerds and plan.
As we get closer to the date, I've been going over in my head all the things I want to tell these actors. I've learned, that NOTHING ever goes as well as it does in my own head, so I'm just setting myself up for humiliation. And, it's not like I've never met a celebrity before. Several years in the radio industry taught me what to do, and definitely what NOT to do when meeting someone famous. (Someday, I'll share the "Del Amitri Incident.") Furthermore, the reality is that most likely we will be shuffled through all the stuff so quickly, I won't even have an opportunity to amaze and delight them with my wit and charm.

And yet, I daydream about all the stupid things I want to tell them.

I want to tell Wil Wheaton "Thank you"...because for all the shit he got for playing Wesley Crusher, I like to think that each hate letter he got meant one less nerd getting shoved into a locker, because the bully was busy writing a letter to Wil Wheaton.

I want to tell Marina Sirtis how the character of Counselor Troi inspired me to write a research paper on the women of Star Trek, and while the broad message was "girls are allowed in Starfleet, but only if they are there to take care of the boys" I appreciate the effort that was made, and realize that true gender equality was most likely sacrificed in order to get the show on the air. (Sadly, even I yawned while reading that.)

I want to tell Levar Burton about the hours that my sister spent watching Reading Rainbow, or how my first doll was named Kizzy, after the character in Roots, or how his brilliant acting made me totally forget he was wearing a hair clip on his face. I feel it's important for him to know that my favorite line ever was during his guest shot on Community when Troy said "Set phasers to 'love me'"
I'm not sure I have anything critical to tell Micheal Dorn or Brent Spiner, so they might just be my "safetys." I guess for Micheal Dorn, I could mention how totally shafted he got when they brought in that little asshole from Family Ties in as Worf's kid. And WTF was that whole thing with Troi? But really, I'm sure he knows that stuff, and I did like him in I Am Weasel. And for Brent Spiner, I guess it would be worth mentioning  how much I love his new web series Fresh Hell, and his ability to laugh at himself and his critics.

But mostly, I want all of them to know that while the dialogue was hokey, and the plots were sometimes thin, I appreciated the commitment they obviously gave to those roles. For me, Star Trek: The Next Generation was sanctuary. It came on Sunday nights, and for an hour, it let me escape the fear of the coming week. And then, as I got my daily ass-kicking in high school, I could comfort myself with the thought that the future would be better. Someday, a kid like me would be sitting at the helm of the Enterprise, like Wesley Crusher. Or, I could be an engineer like LaForge, and repeatedly save the day, just by being a nerd. In Star Trek, the ones that were intelligent, passionate, and thoughtful enough to see both sides of an issue came out on top. Even the android got a fair shot, and that's all I ever really wanted. I just want them all to know, the work they did on that show gave me hope that one day, the geeks would find their place in the universe.

I'll probably just stick with "I love your work" and hope that one day they discover my little blog.

Con Artist - Part I

So, this week, I will be going to my very first Comic Con. I'm not ashamed to admit: I. am. terrified.

For the first time in my life, I'm worried that I'm not geeky enough. As my friend, Riker*, said "I'm worried about being ostracized for being a 'tourist.'" I assured her this was not the case, and didn't tell her that I have the same fear.

Recently, someone said that she told her friend that I am a Trekkie. Her friend responded with "What's her knowledge base?" And there it is. I'm worried that I'm not really a Trekkie, but just the Trek version of Idiot Nerd Girl. What happens if I fail the test that is put before me to determine my level of geekdom?

But then, how do we define who is, and who isn't officially a fan? Are there varying degrees of fandom? Do you have to know, word for word, every line from every episode of every Star Trek series to be considered a Trekkie? Where do I apply for Trek certification? Isn't the fact that I'm willing to declare "I am a Trekkie" enough?

I realized that bullies are everywhere, even in the geek community. There are always going to be people who try to make you doubt yourself in order to make themselves feel better. I can ignore them in other aspects of my life, so I just need to ignore them in ALL aspects of my life. Besides, anyone who truly "gets" Star Trek, knows about the Prime Directive, which states that Starfleet is not to interfere with the natural development of any culture. So, anyone who would judge me as not geeky enough would essentially be trying to interfere with my personal development, and would thus be violating the Prime Directive themselves.

This is why I love Riker, in spite of the fact that she cannot choose between Star Trek, and Star Wars. "I like them both," she admitted one day, embarrassed that she could not reach my level of commitment to the Trek. And even though I have clearly chosen to follow the Prime Directive instead of using the Force, I respect the Jedi and all that they stand for. And if all the Trekkies stick to the Prime Directive, and all the Jedi respect the Force,  then there really is no conflict over which series is better, or who is the bigger geek. I think there's room for us all at the Comic Con. Even the tourists.


*I'll call her Riker, 'cause she's my "Number One" best friend.

Introduction

Firstly, I realize that the term "Trekkie" is supposed to be the derogatory form of "Trekker"  but I've decided that we're taking it back. Maybe "Trekkie" can refer to female fans of Star Trek, and then the guys can have "Trekker" all to themselves. Whatever. We're taking it back, and that's final.

I guess I've always been a Trekkie. It wasn't a choice. Believe me, I denied it for many years, before I finally embraced my true nature. I think my family always knew on some level. But this is who I am, and who I was always meant to be.

It's hard for me to pinpoint the defining moment when I decided to come out of the turbolift, and claim my place in the geek world. It might have been in 1991, going to a Star Trek movie with my dad and hearing someone whisper "There's a GIRL in here!" Or possibly, the paper I wrote in college about "The Women of Star Trek" was what pushed me over the edge. (The only "A" I got in college.) I think about the woman I worked with, who proclaimed she liked the new Star Trek movie with the qualifying "even though I'm a girl" statement. Most people would say it was when I lost my mind in "The Star Trek Experience" in Vegas during my honeymoon, but really, it started long before that. That was just the first clue my husband* had that he was now married to a geek.

Regardless, I'm "out" now, after hiding it for most of my life, and ready to blog about life as a Trekkie, a geek, or whatever you want to call me. Whatever I am, I know I'm not alone, and I know I'm not the only woman who has been afraid to shout out loud "I am a geek!" So, while this blog was started for every person who has told me "You should write a book," I'd like to offer it as a gift to everyone who has been afraid of what people might think of them. I'm not sure how this will evolve, but I'd like to offer the same thing that I have found by watching Star Trek: hope for the future. Or, maybe I just want to write stories that I think are cute and clever. At the very least,instead of telling the "Star Trek Experience" story for the ump-teenth time, I can just tell everyone to "go to my blog."

And don't worry, I'm pretty sure my blog won't be ALL about Star Trek. I like Joss Whedon too. :)

Let your geek flag fly!


*My husband has requested that I not mention him in my blog. However, since most of my recent stories revolve around his non-geek reactions, we have reached a compromise, and he will only be referred to by his Borg designation, which is "Three of Eight."